Tuesday, September 7, 2010

The spirit is mightier than the body


I've been partying. Like a rock star. All weekend.

Only I wore underwear.

And I didn't play any musical instruments.

Partying like a rock star at my house entails eating a lot of red meat and listening to my MIL tell stories about the first time she used Kotex.

Oh, and listening to my sister recall evidence of how I've always been a Crash Test Dummy. (Gots a memory of steel, that one.)

"Remember that time where you took me and all my friends toilet papering and you dropped your car keys in the lawn, but didn't realize it until we were all piled in the car trying to make our get-a-way?" she said.

I didn't remember that one.

"Oh, and remember the time you toilet papered your friends house and then you toilet papered our house too so your friend wouldn't think it was you who toilet papered her house?"

I didn't remember that one either.

"Oh, and remember that time you grabbed one of our brother's garment tops from the dryer and thought it was a t-shirt? So you wore it? To the park? To make out with your boyfriend?"

I do remember that one actually. {cringe} How can one forget the moment one defiles holy underwear? {cringe} How can one forget crawling on ones hands and knees over hot lava rock while doing 1,000 Hail Mary's to seek forgiveness for defiling holy underwear? {cringe, cringe, cringe}

Like Danielle at An Eagle's View always says, I've got cringe charm.

(It's a wonder I haven't been struck by lightening like my gigi.)

So I learned a life lesson this weekend which I would like to share. You know how they say the pen is mightier than the sword? Because you can kill the body but not the mind? Because the mind is full of ideas? And idea's spread faster than cold sores?

(Cold sores are hard to kill too, come to think of it.)

Well I would like to propose that the spirit is mightier than the body. I tried to convince my MIL of this when she was freaking out about the fact that her grave plot runs North and South rather than East and West.

My hub says it's because she got a discount on it, but she says, "nuh uh!" She says her plot used to run East and West before they installed a sprinkler system in the cemetery. Now she's all worried that she'll be turned around when she rises from the grave. I tried to console her by assuring her we will crank her neck to the East when we bury her so she's facing the right direction.

Would that be considered cringe charm, Danielle?

The good thing is that the head stone people have agreed to configure her head stone in such a way that it looks like she is lying East to West, which is all that really matters, right?

It's all true. All of it. Except the part where my MIL was freaking out. I made that part up. She is totally cool with spinning around real quick-like when she rises up so as to make like she was facing East to begin with.

Okay that didn't really prove my theory about the spirit being mightier than the body, did it? Unless of course you believe you can fly no matter where or which direction you are buried.

Or what condition your body is in.

I actually thought up this theory while sitting in church with my Young Women at the Developmental Center, which is a place where people with developmental disabilities live.

You know how there are people in your life who you encounter? Briefly? They can't remember you? But you can't forget them?

The laughing baby in the Orphanage in China.

The shy Jewish boy on the Subway in New York City.

The smiling African kid running along the freeway reading the GMAT study guide.

And Malcolm from Memphis. Sweet, humble Malcolm guile from the Developmental Center, who ate all the sacrament bread after he finished passing it around. He didn't even need to eat it. He probably never kissed anyone enthusiastically while wearing someone else's holy underwear.

You get me?

Malcolm's soul could light the world on fire. And I couldn't keep my eye balls off of him. They were just drawn to him. His spirit was that enormous. Maybe even more enormous than all the other enormous spirits at the Developmental Center. Their bodies aren't attractive. Quite the opposite. Many of them are unable to control their faculties. Many of them take John Mayer's advise seriously (even though he was probably stoned when he wrote it) and they say what they need to say. In fact I would entitle the whole service as Make a Joyful Noise, if you know what I mean. There was plenty of joyful noise to go around. Even I made plenty of joyful noise because the whole experience was so dang awesome.

Fer reals, I was like the Josie and the Pussycats of joyful noise. Tamberine and all.

These people! Their bodies are not free, but their spirits are so flippin' free. It's amazing.

Like I said before, the spirit is mightier than the body.

Speaking of which, one of my girlz from my ole' hood in Provo, Tiffany needs our prayer and donations, if you can. Let's all lend our support, whether it be moral or financial. It seems like a tragic story right now. Like all tragic stories do at the time. But maybe if we squint our eyes up and look at it from a different perspective. A future perspective. A grand scale/grand scheme perspective. Maybe Tiffany's niece has an enormous spirit. Which can no longer be held back by her tiny body.


val of the south said...

Only you can take us from laughing to sweating eyeballs in 30 seconds or definitely have a gift my friend!!

Me (aka Danielle) said...

Yup! That's exactly what I meant by cringe charm! We laugh, we cry, we cringe...all at the same time!

Momza said...

I went over to Tiffany's...I am beyond rational thought.

Cranberryfries said...

Ok that wearing holy underwear to make out thing had me laughing so hard! I love it!!

Welcome to the Garden of Egan said...

I love you Crash.

I love that you can write about Kotex in one sentence and have my eyeballs sweating in the next sentence.

Since my mascara is already running down my face I'm going over to Tiffany's.

About the holy underwear wearing.....I am shock-ed and amaze-ed.

And you lived to tell about it, not struck down and all.

Martha said...

Hey, just wanted to say hello. Nan and Jim were trying to get something together for the twins bday, but it didn't work out. They will still try, but it will be late. Sorry.

Sounds like you got around a little in H.S.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

No Martha, unfortunately my boyfriend is now my hub. ;) hee hee

No worries about the b-day.

Heidi said...

That joyful noise is exactly why we don't allow the Big Guy to drink carbonated drinks or eat beans. We can't seem to do anything about the flipping free vomiting over nothing, however.

Kazzy said...

Dear Josie (and the Pussycats),

You totally crack me up with your joyful, random thoughts.

ps I think the tombstone story was pretty funny.


Martha said...

Nan is so cute. Yesterday she took a blue paper to school and had all the kids sign it for W & G's bday. So I'm mailing it tomorrow. I told her that W & G really liked it at Christmas when all the kids wrote letters to the boys. So look for it.

Sher said...

I'm amazed how you can make me laugh and touch my soul in the same breath.

Alyson | New England Living said...

Oh, how I love thee! I have a mentally disabled sister and you are right...their spirits are big!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Much mahalo everyone for your kind words.

I never know what to say to the kind words.

And thank you Martha for the blue paper signed with lub. I told the twins and they are stoked.