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Tuesday, July 12, 2011

My Quick Fix

I don't think the Universe likes reality t.v. because as soon as I said I wanted a new drug, it gave me a quick fix.


Now my life is super exciting.


~Super exciting, first of all, because I got a cool job.


~Second of all, I got to spend an entire evening chillin' and grillin' at the magic cabin with four dear-to-my-heart families from my old hood in Hawaii. (Okay, okay, it was pouring rain and I made sloppy joes, so we weren't exactly chillin' or grillin' but you get the drift.)


(I also made Martha's pasta salad and for the record Martha is still the reigning queen of pasta salad. When it comes to pasta salad, it appears the only thing I do well is spend hours and hours chopping vegetables with a heart full of love.)


(My camera battery keeled over during dinner, but photographic evidence will be available soon. (Hurry up, Margaret!))


~Third of all, at the very same moment I was chillin' with my Hawaii peeps here in Utah, my ex-door neighbors, Martha and Swirl, were chillin' with my blog peeps in Hawaii.


See, one of my first and favoritest blog readers, Sandi, is there for the birth of her daughter-- Kute Kasey--'s first baby. (P.S. I knew Kute Kasey when she was still a virgin. That's how long I've been blogging.) (P.S.S. I also taught Kute Kasey's hub when he was still a virgin. That's how long I haven't been teaching.)


I was kinda gang green with envy about the whole thing, but Martha and Swirl eased the blow by giving Sandi and Kute Kasey a tour of my former postage stamp yard, and front porch as if it were Graceland. Then they asked the new owners to turn on the porch light so they could get a picture in the very spot where all the magic began.


Someday this picture might be worth more than a thousand words so I decided to autograph it for them.


You're welcome guys.


I mean, thanks guys!


LY!!!


~Fourth of all, I am dogsitting my niece's puppy so I get to double my pleasure for the whole week.


~Fifth of all, my oldest son, who is now in Boston playing basketball with the big boys, and who got to meet Danny Ainge, will once again be in my arms and under my thumb tomorrow night.


~And last, and yet least of all, I am having lunch tomorrow with my hub's ex-girlfriend. Don't ask, but yep, it's the same girlfriend who drove a Trans Am. Yep, same girlfriend I used to fantasize about flinging across the universe by her natural blond pony tail. Yep, same girlfriend I squirted with a water gun while she was slow dancing with my man. (Oooops-a-daisy.)


In a nutshell, it's the same girlfriend who made my senior year kinda les miserables. Kinda la vida miserabla. If you get my drift.


But I'm over it. Totally over it. 27 years later and I'm a big girl now.


Besides, I have no idea what he saw in her anyway.


Mwuaahahahaha.


Kidding, peeps! I am mature enough to admit she was bee-U-tiful.



And that not only did we fight over the same boyfriend, we also fought over the same cheer camp counselor.


I just hope and pray that time has been kind to her. But not too kind. You get me?


(pssssssst . . . do you guys want photographic evidence? Just say the word and I'll recharge my battery before lunch.)



12 comments:

Amanda said...

I've been a lame follower, lately...sorry! But it was such fun to come back and read today's post. Love it!

I can't believe Kute Kasey is preggo AND overdue...where have I been the last 9 months? And she looks great!

I love the girls left the light on for ya...so sweet and thoughtful :)

Miss hanging here and reading your blog everyday, but sh....errr....life has happened and has gobbled up all of my time.

springrose said...

Of course we want photographic evidence of the lunch with the ex! Um Hello!!! You are braver than I. I met my Hubs ex once. The first comment out of his mouth was wow shes blown up. I mean gained some weight. Yep, haven't we all? We can't all stay a size 2 forever!
I love the picture where it all started.
I also hope for poor Kute Kasey has her baby, right now!!! I feel bad for anyone who is overdue!

IWA (e - va) said...

hah! I love this post!

First off, You won and he goes home with you every night.. and no matter what everybody says about it being about the race.. Your son is right in this instant... It's all about who won!
(we'll that's what i keep telling myself! LOL!)

Hi Sandi! i <3 Army WIves (watched the first 4 seasons in 3 and dont think i ever cried so much in 3 days!!!!) and yay for being here in hawaii and becoming a Grandma! (is this your first?)

Crash.. Please take pictures at lunch.. and feel free to photoshop and add any unpleasantries that you can think of!! haha!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

ha ha ha Iwa! Hopefully she gives me plenty to work with. ha ha

I am totally going to watch Army Wives now. I need a good cry.

Amanda, I have missed you too, but TOTALLY get it! Blogging is not the end all!

Springrose, I hope I can say the same for my hub's ex. lol. But I have a snaking suspicion she's going to be a twig.

Jury will convene manana.

TisforTonya said...

yes - we abso-freakin'-lutely need photographic evidence... maybe this time you won't need photoshop for the facial hair? (kidding, only people with the lovely Spanish heritage that I have need to worry about their 'stache when going out to lunch with you)

wendy said...

I think we were all praying you'd "GET A LIFE", so you wouldn't have to resort to reality tv.
we like YOUR reality.
what Job did you get.
those were all good things to get you excited about.

Sandi said...

awww...we made the front page of the blog! I feel a little famous. I love that phrase "la vida miserabla" patent that one sistah!
We are going in at 7 a.m. and KK will FINALLY be induced! Only 12 days late! I just read your virgin comments to my whole family and we all blushed and giggled a little bit ha ha.
I loved loved LOVED meeting Swirl and Martha- we sat in Swirls' house and chatted forever and we had yummy dessert and just acted like we knew each other forever. It was da bomb diggity.
Good luck on the lunch date...sounds kinda like a Utard thing to do...just saying.

Sandi said...

Oh, and thanks for all the nice thoughts for KK from your readers. So nice!
And Iwa, HI!! I keep thinking I might run into you too and wonder if I would recognize or know it was you. I am at foodland an awful lot, maybe you should come there at any given time and I will probably be there :)

Sandi said...

......and what the heck....you got a job????

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Sandi, woohooo for KK being induced FINALLY. Poor thing. Hopefully they do that slow drip, because induction is intense.

I hope you do run into Iwa at Foodland. She's the pretty one with the big smile. wish I could run into you at Foodland sometime! Or at Swirl's house. So jealous!!!!!!! I miss those girls. Too bad Anjeny wasn't there. She's the bomb diggity too.

I got a writing job. My dream job. Woooohooooo! Something I don't have to leave my bed to do. How perfect is that!

And T, for the record, the irish and the portagee have to worry about their stashes before they go out to lunch too.

It is totally Utarded to do lunch with the girlz. Someone pop-U-lar from high school is in town and I somehow got invited. I finally made it to the in-crowd. ha ha No one ever did lunch with the girlz when I was in town, but whateva!

The only reason I'm going is because the restaurant is owned by my ex-boyfriend. hee hee IThe blogging possibilities are endless.)

Okay, he wasn't really my boyfriend, but he took me to my Prom and his Prom and I've posted photos of my terrible, horrible, no good, very bad dresses.

Remember?

Martha said...

So a writing job??? You gotta tell us more than that.

Yes, we had a ton of fun with Kasey and Sandi at Swirl's house. I just checked FB and two hours ago still no baby. Kasey's been there for like 15 hours already. Poor girl.

Donna said...

admit it! past girlfriends make the best stories!!