I feel like that old saying The hurrieder I go, the behinder I get. (Ironically, the hurrieder I eat, the behinder I get too.) (hee hee)
Ain't it funny how you turn into all the old sayings on your childhood walls. Watch what you put on your childhood walls, peeps, for they will become your destiny.
Oh, wow. Did I just get all James Allen on you?
So I've been making a trek ROCKUMENTARY for the past four days. That's what I've been doing. Because I know the pioneers would've rocked out had they had the option. But now I'm behinder than I was last week when I was just behind.
When I give my first General Conference address I'm going to title it Behind, Behinder, and Behindest. Because life is about choices and priorities, even when you're in the red.
The worst part about being behinder is that my brain gets all blogged up. I need a plunger to unplug all the ideas and stories stuck in my brain right now.
Braden Bell and my mom are not going to like this analogy, because they both have delicate sensibilities, but when my brain gets full it's not unlike when my bladder gets full. I have so many full bladder stories, peeps. Oh, I could keep you here all night with my bus-across-New-England-with-a-full-bladder stories alone. That doesn't include my dating-with-a-full-bladder stories.
Maybe I will make my millions writing a series of full-bladder books. Like this one time I went on this date wid dis guy from da Bronx that I met at Nathan's. Shee wiz, (no pun intended) I shoulda known bettaw dan to cruise NYC on a full bladdaw wid some wize guy from da Bronx.
Ooooh, did that sound like Larry, Curly and Moe all rolled into Al Pacino's body? How gifted am I?
Anyways, point is, I need to relieve my brain. ASAP.
But first I need to wualk my duawg, clean my cawr and mowr my luawn.
Ya get me?
BYW, I stand corrected about Bawston. My friend Lisr says it's pronounced Bahston. And just because she's lived there for a handful of years she thinks she knows mo bettah.
Hmmph. (Hahved Yahd snobs!)
Well, I just spent a whole post saying absolutely nothing at all, didn't I?
I guess that makes me behindest now.
P.S. You know my dang stinkin' friggin cute dog, Lulu? The one that I lub and adore with all my stone cold heart?
She ate my pretty shoes.