Thursday, September 10, 2009

I'm sorry, but . . .

My apologies for being such a Debbie-downer yesterday. (Get it? Debbie-downer?) hee hee 

I hope I didn't put a damper on your day with my random bout of grief and loss.  That came out of nowhere.  But it's all good.  I'm fine.  No worries.

And my apologies for apologizing. I'm sorry about that.  It's just something we do in Utah. That's what makes us so humble and pleasant.  One of the luxuries of living in Utah is that you can say or do anything you want as long as you apologize before, during or afterwards.  And if you punctuate your apology with a "but" you can even be rude, arrogant, condescending or insincere.  

So again, I'm sorry, but can I just say MAHALO to all my peeps for their lub and support yesterday in my hour of need?  I mean, I didn't really need it, per say, (sorry) but it was a nice thought.  

Was that too mushy?  Sorry, but fo' real, the air hugs were cool.  It was like getting therapy and getting a pedicure at the same time.   

In fact, if my Dumb and Dumber cooking blog project doesn't fly, I might start a therapy/pedicure blog. You unload your pain while I give you a pedicure.  The pleasure of the pedicure will counteract the pain of the therapy.  

I'll call it Head to Foot.  

Sorry, but you have to admit it's brilliant.  

Speaking of my cooking blog, I went to IKEA with Val of the South and Jillybean today.  We ate lunch, of course.  And we talked, of course.  And we shopped, of course.  But we also purchased my first cooking blog apron.  And I struck a few poses for my profile pic.

Look Ma, no tan!

Which one should I use for my book cover when I get discovered? 

Val and Jillybean also purchased an apron so they can be Crash Test Dummies in the kitchen too. 

Jillybean is going to Bedazzle my blog name on the front of hers.  (Free advertising.)   (Sorry, Jilly, but I can't pay you.  You will be blessed for serving me so willingly though.)

And here we are after lunch.  How cute is Val (in black)? I bet she's just as cute in white.  And isn't Jilly kinda . . . dare I say . . . sexy?    And look at me.  Take a good look at my face.  

If you look closer it's easy to trace the tracks of my tears. 

(someone should write a song about that!)  

When I got home from IKEA there was a mysterious package from my x-next door neighbor, Martha. She sent me four pair of magic traveling pants.  YAY! (Do you think she wants to start a sisterhood?)   

MAHALO, Martha.  I'm sorry, but you da bomb!  U know U R!  Can't wait for the magic to begin. I think it will be soon because I heard a rumor that a Mormon author is moving into my ward.   Do you think it's Annette Lyon?  Or Stephanie Meyer?  Or Orson Scott Card?  Maybe it's my old creative writing teacher, Chris Crowe. 

I hope it's not Jack Wayland.  I'm sorry, but I HATED HATED HATED Sam so if it's Jack Wayland I'm so going to TP his house.


val of the south said...

Wow, first 2 days in a row? Either I'm super cool, or I have no life...let's not answer that!

So much fun yesterday! Thanks - I needed it too. I wore my apron last night while reheating leftovers for dinner (didn't want to mess it up by actually cooking in it!)

Love ya tons!

The Garden of Egan said...

Lookds like you had a ton of fun at your IKEA shopping spree! Love the aprons, I look forward to your cookbook with bated breath. Will your food be normal? Will I be able to find the ingredients in my pantry? Or will I have to shop at strange places or exotic IKEA. (we don't have those in Idaho)
Uhm, Jack Weyland lives two blocks from me, I don't he will be your new neighbor, so save the TP.

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

Don't you love IKEA? Fun food, fun stuff and awesome aprons. You should buy more and sell them on your cooking blog (you could autograph them!)

Any cool Crash-like bloggers live in Philly? Cause I could stand an Ikea trip too..

lori said...

how did you get that apron to match your shirt in both pictures, even though they aren't the same color in either of them? You have amazing skills! hope you have a happy day! (and here is an extra hug for you and your daughter)

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

I totally have apron and IKEA envy. Looks like such a good time. Glad you could cheer each other up. And sorry I was the one to point out the downiness of yesterday's post. You are allowed to be down, you know. If you don't go down, you can't come up.

DeNae said...

Here's the crazy thing: I actually thought about stopping at IKEA on my way out of town yesterday. It was about 12:30, and I bet you gals were still there, be-aproned and everything! That's what I get for ignoring the spirit. Wicked, wicked spirit-ignoring DeNae!!

Looks like fun, too...sob!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Oh DeNae, LISTEN TO THE SPIRIT, girlfriend. That would have been heelarious to run into you at IKEA when you didn't even know we were there celebrating the fact that you were in Utah. Talk about a great surprise party. NEXT TIME!

Andrea, I would love to go to IKEA in Philly with you. I'll start working towards it.

Oh my goodness, Garden of Egan, how embarrassing that you live two blocks from Jack Wayland and I totally insulted him on my blog. I bet he's a real nice Jack in real life. But I am glad I don't have to waste the toilet paper.

Ha ha Val, I put my apron on to wash the dishes and sweep the floor. I would never cook in it either. hee hee

Lori, that was crash magic effects. Notice my necklace matches too. I'm hip like that.

Hi Pat. CONGRATS on the BYU victory. I keep meaning to say that. I thought about you all night long.

springrose said...

Cute pics, looks like you all had fun! Glad someone could be close and pick you up!! Cute apron as well. I am impressed it matched your clothes so well!! As for my comment yesterday if you go to my blog and scroll down a ways you will see a picture of the necklaces my daughters made. I will post maybe next week on how to make them. Have fun!

IWA (e - va) said...

I totally thought about NHC too, when BYU won!

I love the "sorry" bit... i say it way too much.. now i know where i picked up that bad habit! heehee!

Love Ikea... Love the apron... and i love that someone else also thought that your outfits matched it perfectly! I kept looking at the pics to see if your tops were part of the aprons!

So I know that Ive told you this a million times.. but Your playlist did it again! It has magic healing powers i tell you! and I Found new favorite songs that I'll probably listening to all day.. Pony (It's Okay) awesome.. imagine archuleta style.. how come ive never heard that #13 (anyone else but you!.. too funny!) love it!

Chief said...

I'm so glad you are doing better even though you might have been ok in the first place.

Love Jilly...looks like you had fun!

Tiffany said...

Glad your doing better, a trip to IKEA always brightens my life.

I hope it is Stephanie, I love her books like a vampire loves human blood.

Melanie J said...

How come DeNae is commenting on everyone else's blog except mine? DENAE!

Chris Crowe was my sec ed methodology teacher (and you really do need to read that as SEC ed and nothing similar) and my student teaching supervisor and he was great.

Was creative writing fun with him? I can't imagine him teaching that even though he's an author and all.

CaJoh said...

So glad you can "get it out on the table". No need to apologize— we understand your home-sickness.

Gotta love IKEA. Every time I go there I want to throw out all of our furniture and start from scratch— but then I look at my balance in my checkbook and wind up getting a rug instead.

The Garden of Egan said...

Because I'm visiting in Utah and because I read your blog and I became envious of you for going to IKEA I went on an IKEA search didn't turn out well. I never found it.....roads in Utah are very scary.

The Garden of Egan said...

Also....Dear Crash,
What does Mahalo mean?
Today to me my word would be Mahello.....translated:
Driving in Utah is Mahello!

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

Crash and Iwa, that is too funny that I am becoming one with the BYU football team. At least in your minds. In my mind also. Yes I was uber happy beyond belief when they won the game. I am starting my list of players to stalk when they come to Vegas in a month. Wahoo!!!!

Debbie said...

It sounds like this lunch with friends was just what you needed. I hope life is going well for you guys in your new place. Looks like a fabulous afternoon!!
(Debbie downer....haha)

Jillybean said...

I like the first picture of you (with the frying pan) for the profile pic on your new cooking blog. If It wasn't for all of the price tags in the background I would totally believe that you were in your kitchen cooking.

I bet you always smile like that when you're cooking.

I'm still laughing at you calling me sexy. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
Maybe that's why I got a hug from that cute guy that took the picture.

Mariko said...


You're doing a cooking blog without me?

You're doing IKEA without me?

(that comes out sounding sinful, don't it?)

Co and I talked about you tonight. I hate how it sounds like reminiscing. :(

I've been planting bugs all over the place. Hopefully some of them become infectious.

I've been looking for a replacement Tatum, but no one is willing to say Poo. Even with an 'h'.

Annette Lyon said...

I'm sitting here trying to figure out whether to be honored or totally embarrassed. I was in the same sentence as Jack Weyland.

But also in the same one as Orson Scott Card. I KNOW I'm not in *HIS* league . . .

Hmm . . .


(I could probably throw a rock and hit your house. And I won't be moving any time soon. Just sayin')

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Iwa, I LUB my playlist too. Truthfully, I didn't listen to it much in Hawaii, but I listen to it for hours at a time in Utah. I lub lub lub the pony song. I stole that from Blogging Mama Andrea. I can't believe you've never heard Archie sing Imagine. It's an American Idol classic. You were probably watching Twilight. I mean, studying, you crazy math chica.

MELANIE, SHUT UP! Are you serious??? Chris Crowe was my favorite teacher. He is the one who made me believe in myself first. Too bad you only had him for sec ed though. I can't imagine him teaching that. I wouldn't say he was a fun teacher, but I lub lub lubbed him. He taught me what I needed to know.

OMGOSH, CAJOH, me too! I lub to buy rugs at IKEA. High Five!

Garden of Egan, hee hee Mehello? LOLOL. mahalo means THANK YOU! Mehello is that greeting/wave you give with one finger. IKEA is just off the freeway just after the point of the mountain. I wish I had known you were here in Utah. We would have lubbed to buy aprons with you at IKEA.

Jilly, I DO smile like that when I'm cooking. How did you know? And you ARE sexy. LOL about that nice boy taking your photo. I am in lub with that nice boy. Too bad he's only 4 years old.

Mariko, LOLOLOL That was your funniest comment ever. ha ha ha That did sound sinful. ha ha ha ha ha You are SO right about the reminiscent thing. Thats the worst part about time moving forward. Reminiscent means it's over and over is a big commitment. Mahalo for planting the bugs. sometimes bugs ain't so bad after all. It really helped.

ANNETTE? You could throw a rock at my house????? Are you lyon? OMGOSH! If your house gets tp'd I swear I didn't do it.

Dolly said...

Since I have to go back to Riyadh this week, I was trying to thinking about all of the good things laying in bed last night. (Trying not to stress about leaving Hawaii), and I says to myself, at least I have Ikea in Riyadh. That's one thing Hawaii doesn't have.

I find so much comfort at Ikea! I wrote a whole blog story about it at

And at least in Riyadh I won't be doing my taxes and remodeling an apartment and negotiating with tenants....... So I may actually take photos and write more blog stories and then I'll have more than TWO whole stories before I comes back to Hawaii in two more months.

Hurrah for IKEA and nots having to leave Hawaii for forevah!

Don't be mad that I am coming back to Hawaii because you can come back too! My cute house is going to be empty for those two months and you can come and use it as your writing cottage getaway place. It's a great place for inspiration and healing and for creative things successful things to happen from here!