Thursday, November 11, 2010

Yo Adrian!

We did it!!!

That's what my 14-year-old son was shouting while listening to the Rocky theme song on Monday before basketball tryouts.

It worked. He made the team. The varsity team (as a freshman). (Was that Braggetty Anne?)

It worked for me too. Thanks to YOU. I made the finals for that Good Mood Blogger gig!

Cue collective cheer.

My hub videotaped me after the final battle with Scott, Antuan and Bisma in the last two minutes of the race.

As soon as he stopped taping I made like a dummy and crashed!

Get it, crashed.

(Sometimes I crack myself up. )

But fer reals, I did drop dead from sheer and utter exhaustion. I didn't catch a single wink of sleep on Tuesday night. I didn't mean to stay up all night long, I just had a lot to do before leaving for Colorado. I fully intended on sleeping as soon as my list was complete, but it wasn't complete until I hopped in the car at 8 a.m.

I don't think I've ever done that before--just kept right on keeping on through the whole day and night. It wasn't that bad either-- just seemed like one big 'ole super sized day.

And now I'm in Colorada Springs, or as all the signs say, Colo Spgs, and I can sleep as much as I please, or don't please.

BTW, I totally get why they call it ColoRADa. This is one RAD state. Denver, WOW! What a cool, hip, happening vibe.

From a drive-by standpoint.

I LUB road trips. And unfamiliar places. And unfamiliar hotels. And cars. I got to ride all the way here in a Chevy Malibu. Car #9 from the BYU Motor Pool, baby! So stinkin' clean. And the leg room was to die for. I was seriously doing yoga stretches all the way across Whyoming.

I gotsta give props to Whyoming too. My hub said we were taking the boring route, because it was also the safe route (ain't that just like life). He was right, it was super safe--we drove completely around that whole snow storm brewing on the horizon.

(Can I just confess that I was having weird what if thoughts about that storm. Every time I'd stop at a McDonalds and update my Facebook status I would think, what if this is the last thing I ever say before . . . the storm? What if these are my last words? My famous last words? Do I want my famous last words to be spoken from McDonalds? Do I want my friends and fans and fam all over the world to be sniffling and saying, "Life is so strange. One minute she's at McDonalds in Whyoming watching Sports Center in the bathroom, and the next minute . . . poof.")

(Do you mind if I add one more parenthetical paragraph? It's just that when you're separated from your kids and your dog by 12 hours, a lot depends upon you . . . returning. You just need to return. To them. Oh, I hope I can always return to them. Until they don't need me to return anymore.)

(You get me?)

Bottom line--I didn't mind the safe route. People were super nice on the safe route. I can't tell you how many people made eye contact with me and smiled at me in Whyoming. It was like I was actually . . . present. Like in their path. Like they could totally see me. It was weird.

And I sorta liked it.

And it wasn't that boring either. Thanks to Little America. Little America dominates the Whyoming landscape. I have a lot of photographic evidence to prove this if anyone wants to take me to court over it.

Hey, speaking of court, guess what? I'm going to court. ME! I'm disputing my traffic ticket. OMGOSH, do you guys think I'm crazy? Fighting da man! Does anyone have a shot against DA MAN?

I'm going to have my hub write me a doctors note about my condition--my rare form of narcalepsy--telling the judge about how easily I slip into a coma if I drive less than 30 mph.

So help me strategize. Should I encourage my eyeballs to sweat for the judge? Or should I go the cleavage route? I don't have any of my own cleavage, but I could borrow some from my sock drawer. Or maybe I could ask Victoria her secret.

Okay, one last thing. You know how I told you yesterday that I couldn't wait to get away from my son who's eyeballs are single to the glory of the iPod Touch? Well this morning I got on Facebook and who do you think messaged me? My son.

"Plz Plz Plz" he says. "Bring me back an iPod touch from Colo Spgs."

"Patience is a virtue," I tell him. "Especially with Christmas around the corner. "

"Then I have lots of virtue," he says

"And virtue is more important than an iPod" I tell him with a self-righteous hmph.

Am I great mom or what?

Well, I gotsta go chillax.

Peace out, peeps!


T said...


T said...

oh, and save the cleavage route for a summer trip - it's awesome really... but not when the roads are icky.

This Colorado (except I pronounce it with my Spanish accent - ColoRahDo) girl actually suggests only going in the summer and avoiding nasty weather altogether... but it's too late for that so enjoy the Springs... shout out a huge Aloha to my favorite Lori and all the rest of my family while you're there... I'll tell them to listen for crazy random Aloha shouts throughout town :)

T said...

haha - should have explained that one (I was getting carried away) YOUR cleavage route was about getting out of your traffic ticket (stick with sweaty eyeballs... especially if you have a woman judge) MY cleavage route is the other Colorado-Utah corridor through the mountains... sorry for the mix-up :) (and yes, it probably IS tacky that I refer to it as the cleavage route... and no, I don't have any tacky names for the Wyoming route... "boring" is sufficient)

T said...

should I leave your comment box alone now?

The Crash Test Dummy said...

T, I'm meeting Lori for lunch today. Woohooo!

Thanks for clarifying the cleavage thing.

hee hee

Jillybean said...


When you go to court, you could use both the cleavage thing AND the sweaty eyeball thing. The judge will be so distracted that he'll dismiss your case.

Or you could just take your hub with and have him dance for the judge.

Here's what you should tell your iPod obsessed son.
"I could buy you an iPod in Colorado, but it wouldn't work in Utah due to the difference in elevation."
Or "It won't work in the different time zone."
Or "The agriculture inspection people wouldn't let me bring it across the state border because it's an apple"

Martha said...

Congrats a million times. And double congrats to Zach. He is so awesome and in 4 years he will be playing for the Seasiders!!

Hey so T tells me you know Brad Pearce. Put in a good word for Josh. Josh is applying to Provo and of course wants to play tennis.

So the football boys are doing another rally tonight??? I guess I haven't heard about it. Kahuku really got ripped off, but I think it's over.

This IPod thing is getting out of control. Maybe he should start an online contest or do a bball shooting-a-thon to earn money.

IWA (e - va) said...

So i actually know a few things about traffic court there... and Im not confessing that i ever got stopped...

So first when you go to court, the police officer is there and his lawyer takes you outside to chat with you for a few minutes before the trial.. The lawyer will tell you it's just so that “he can get familiar with the case”…. But DON’T TELL THE LAWYER ANYTHING…. they’ll take everything you say and twist it around when you get on the stand!

Also don’t admit to anything, Just respond, “I don’t know that it occurred”…. And then do that thing when your brain doesn’t know if it did or not, so you wont be lying on the stand! .

Those Utah traffic court lawyers are very tricky and they’ll try to get to admit to something you don’t want to. So think long and speak very very slowly and pause a lot…. Because that confuses them! And then cry so it confuses them more! Haha!

I know of someone who told a judge that the police officer didn’t show them the gun, so they don’t know that they were going over the speed limit, because she is a Neurotic Over Achiever and God Fearing and would never break the law intentionally, and if it was a mistake, she is sure that it was also a mistake that the police officer pulled her over and not the car in front of her that passed her really fast! And it worked!

I also wouldn’t recommend telling the judge that you’re not going to vote for them in the next election… and then back it up with and you got lots of friend that you can make sure that they don’t get back in! (Im not admitting that I did that also!)

Garden of Egan said...

Uh, what's cleavage?

Garden of Egan said...

OK just kiddin' I know what cleavage is, I just don't gots any.
Don't do the sweaty eyeballs thing though.
DaMan hates that!

Glad you are having fun. Please know more sleeping and driving. More dangerouser than texting and driving.

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

OK do you get to go to the football game this weekend? That would be so awesome. could you stalk some football players for me. Of course it is easier at the fireside on Friday night.

Kazzy said...

You are gonna take the whole sha-bang! Yeah!

Annette Lyon said...

You made it! YAAAAAY!

Road trip sounds like a ball--including the yoga stretches.

Good luck with the ticket. I was called in to testify in a traffic ticket case (guy rear-ended me and contested it--I was just a witness on the stand). The only case that didn't get "guilty as charged" was one where the judge couldn't tell what had happened in an accident because a key witness didn't show.

So, yeah. Tough nut to crack, that.