Nevada wasn't the only one who noted that my student, Benjamin Buttars would make a better glittery vampire than Edward. (I added the glittery part because BB despises glittery vampires.)
If you look closely at his face you can see it shimmering.
(he he he)
I never noticed it before, but Nevada has a point.
If you look closely you can almost imagine Benjamin Buttars sitting in class being repelled by the scent of true love.
Look at him struggling to resist his conflicting impulses. Should he turn and run from love? Or should he take a bite out of it?
But who does he love? Is it the lovely Jasmine seated next to him? She is muy muy bonita, afterall.
No! It is the lovely April sitting across from him. (Sorry Jasmine. Blondes really do have more fun, trust me.)
Now scroll back and watch him struggle.
He he he
(I should have been an evil mad scientist instead of an evil mad English teacher.)
(That dude's name isn't really Jacob, it's Justin.)
Real life is an awful lot like movie life if you ask me.
And guess what else Benjamin Buttars is in real life?
A ROCK STAR!
He's got a band and he's going to share his music with us. But first you'll have to sleep over in my comment box waiting for the ticket booth to open. (Didn't I tell you guys my students were V.I.P.'s?)
And here's one more weird Benjamin Buttars story with a Wolfgang twist:
Next week BB is going to New York for a journalism conference so I'm like, "you oughta go see Les Miserables on Broadway since we'll be reading it next month."
And you know what he says to me? He says, "I've seen Les Miserables on Broadway many times."
So I'm like, "Oh yea, well I bet you haven't seen it more times than me. I've seen it six times! TOP THAT Benjamin Button!"
And you know what he says to me? He says, "Oh yea, well I played Jean Val Jean during my summer stock theater days. TOP THAT Dummy!"
Guess what popped into my head as soon as he said that?
I had a vision of Wolfgang pushing Jean Val Jean down the stairs. Isn't it weird how life plays itself out backwards and upside down and sideways?
Do you think Wolfgang was foreshadowing his own Benjamin Buttars envy?
Just in case, I hereby declare Benjamin Buttars ineligible to compete in the I-double-dog-dare-you-to-steal-my-heart-from-Wolfgang-contest.
It wouldn't be fair to put a tremendous Austrian up against a summer stock Jean Val Jean/glittery vampire/rock star.
No doubt Wolfgang would push him down the stairs.
So do you want to see the first finalist in the contest?
It was a tough choice.
I was going to pick Kyle Kyle, but he fell asleep.
And then I was going to choose Emma because she wears tie dye and because she was born with a tooth in her mouth, which has gotta be some kind of omen, don't you think? But Emma is almost as mouthy as Kyle. The first thing she says every day when I walk into class is "Can we cancel class? Can we? Can we? Can we? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can we go home? Huh? Can we NOT take this quiz? Can we NOT do this assignment?"
So I've decided the first finalist will be Raphael. He used to be a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle and he's a French beat boxer. (I'm hoping French beat boxing is more romantic than Americn beat boxing because boxing isn't my favorite violent sport.)