You guys want a great dieting tip? Run away to Kona with my mom. We haven't eaten in 3 days because I'm waiting for her to make a decision. Even a suggestion would be great. Every time I ask her what she feels like eating she says, "anything is fine with me," or "I'm not really that hungry."
But if I ask her what she feels like smelling she would yak attack my ears off. "Ooooh, how about Estee Lauder Beautiful, or Glade Clean Linen, or Febreeze Lavender Vanilla and Comfort or Bath and Body Works Brown Sugar Creamy Vanilla Mocha Iced Chocolate Chip Banana Pancakes."
And then she would drag me to Macy's to try on every perfume in the store to determine whether I'm a spice, a floral or a citrus.
(I'm a floral, btw)
Her nose knows what it likes but her taste buds are severely neglected. I'm thinking of calling social services on her. Seriously! If you ask her what she wants to drink she says "water, please. Straight up. Or with a twist of Mozart." But if you say "Mmmm hows about a Pepsi?" She'll say, "No, I don't want a Pepsi because I enjoy Pepsi."
What a silly goose!
Other than that she's just like every other normal, run-of-the-mill, ordinary, mom who's saw Purple Rain over a hundred times in the 80's before flying to L.A. for a Prince concert (before he was formerly known as the artist-formerly-known-as-Prince).
She's not as quirky as my MIL. She'll actually laugh herself silly over The Office and peer pressure me into adding U2's latest song Get On Your Boots to my playlist becasue "doesn't it have a Beatles flavor? Don't you just love all the rifts?"
And we can gab like girlfriends about American Idol or Dancing with the Stars.
Anyway, today was an absolutely astonishingly gorgeous day. I'm not exaggerating, it was a take-your-breath-away day, especially through the lenses of my new rose-colored sunglasses my mom talked me into buying along with 3 new shower curtain liners, a $13 T-shirt and a candy apple red purse.
But guess what, peeps! Life is so much more beautiful when looking through rose colored sunglasses, especially if you're carrying a candy apple red purse. Everything is deeper and richer and brighter and rosier. You can't stop saying WOW and HOLY HELK!
I highly recommend it.
Soooo do you want a summary of why I'm here with my mom and my twins?
Everything boils down to basketball in my family.
We're watching my twins play basketball. But in between the basketball games, we've been sneaking around and doing some sight seeing.
You know how the church says to stand in Holy Places? Well, today we've been taking their advice and it really works. Besides doing a session at the Kona temple, we visited a heiau built by King Kamehameha in 1790. If I had asthma I would have needed an inhaler--that's how high the holiness factor was. I'm telling you, you could cut the holiness with a knife.
Kamehameha built this sacred temple after the prophet Kapoukahi told him he would conquer all the islands if he built a large heiau dedicated to his family war god atop of Whale Hill (Pu'ukohola).
Imagine thousands of men camped on this hill for a year to work on the massive structure constructed of water worn lava. These men formed a human chain nearly 20 miles long transporting the rocks hand to hand.
WOW! HOLY HELK!
Do you have chills right now, cuz I do. At least I did while I was looking at this:
I got excited because I thought I captured a ghost on film.
But then I realized it was just my shadow.
Anyway, having fun in Kona! Wish you were here!