And guess what!
She's got a sexy voice.
It's like butter. Country Crock butter.
Or cream. Whipped cream in a can.
If whipped cream in a can was made of velvet and country crock butter was made of silk that would be her voice.
You wanna see photographic evidence that I met her?
This is me and Mariko if I were a smokin' hot sparkly vampire and she were a tub of country crock butter. (Can you see me glittering?)
This is me and Mariko if I had Betty Davis eyes.
And she had Pantene Pro-V hair.
This is me and Mariko and our History Day guru friend, Colleen.
Did you forget to wear your 3-D glasses too?
Okay, stare at the photo for 30 seconds without blinking.
You are getting sleeeeeepy.
Now move to the left at super sonic speed.
Now the right.
Left again. Up. Down. Up. Down. To the left. To the left. Everything you own in a box to the left.
Faster! Faster! (Is that really EVERYTHING you own?)
(Btw, is it just me or does Mariko seem a bit intolerant of the dummy?)
(Snobbity can of spray whipped cream!)
So in my last post I started telling you about my big day out with my girlz in the hood.
All my girlz already told their versions of the day (see my last post for links).
They told it like it was. Exactly like it was.
I call that happening truth (because Tim O'Brien calls that happening truth).
The thing about happening truth is WHO CARES?
Except those rare souls who want to know if you cleaned out your car before you went to Arbys.
Swirl told the happening truth. And Martha told the happening truth plus a bunch of TMI about her husband's sock drawer, her Kohls.com addiction and her fat retirement check which she safety pinned to her bra as soon as the Arbys cashier extended her palm.
Martha, try to get to girlz day before page 200!
Oh, and Martha, must you make us sound like a the Golden Girls taking our first field trip away from the nursing home?
At least Anjeny used the word crazy ladies enough to make us sound like Golden Girls gone wild!
So who wants to hear the story truth raise your hand?
Okay, but can I get through History Day first? pretty please!
BRB (BE RIGHT BACK)
W!DM (Wait! Dont' MOVE!)
ISSRTYAUFI! (I said, stay where you are until further instruction!)
AYSH? CIN (Are you STILL here? Cuz I'm not.)