Make that three modes. I left out his shhh-be-QUIET-I'm-watching-24-mode. (When it's a 2 hour special he says he's watching 48. True story.)
When he's in his motivational speaker mode it's a bit like watching Chris Farley on SNL.
He subscribes to the notion that you can psych out your own emotions by telling yourself you love something you hate until you actually do LOVE IT!
Apparently it works because that's how he fell in love with me.
My hub actually has the I LOVE IT! coin from the Mental Diet "Lucky" Coin collection. I jest you not. Check this out.
Seriously, check it out right now. I'll wait.
Whenever our kids find themselves facing extreme opposition and complaining about it he gets right in their face and screams "YOU LOVE IT!"
And then he makes them scream back in his face "I LOVE IT."
It looks a little somethin' like this:
And then I point to his van down by the river and say "GO!"
But because I feel a strong need to mold my students into carbon copies of myself I decided to try this technique on my class this semester.
If you read my favorite student post you know that Jason is ineligible to be my favorite student because he's a little bit country (and I'm a little bit alternative).
To reform him I gave him the I LOVE IT coin with step by step instructions:
STEP 1. Remove Garth Brooks, Toby Keith and Carrie Underwood from your playlist.
STEP 2. Add The Fray, Radio Head, Keane and Cold Play to your playlist.
STEP 3. Place I LOVE IT coin in your pocket and rub it whenever you listen to your playlist.
STEP 4. Repeat the phrase "I love alternative music" over and over while listening to your playlist.
STEP 5. If this doesn't work drink a gallon of Nyquil and repeat steps 1-4.
For the most part.
I also tried this on Emma. If you read this post you'll know that Emma doesn't like quizzes, writing assignments, reading assignments, class lectures, class discussions or being in class. So I gave her the coin with her list of instructions.
This technique (coupled with some good ole' fashioned public humiliation) seemed to do the trick.
Nelli was in the running for my favorite student because she changed her major to English and she got my family into the PCC with her employee discount (shhhhh). But then she took herself out of the game by harrassing me in my comment box yesterday (and by singling Les Miserables out of tune).
Plus I caught her Tahitian dancing at PCC.
You all know how I feel about this sort of unrighteousness.
There is a way back, Nelli. Repeat after me: "I love righteousness!"
Getting Kyle Kyle to love Tim O'Brien was a little trickier.
I don't think he followed the instructions correctly because if he had his brain disorder would be healed and he would now be testifying of Tim O'Brien to every kindred, tongue, and people.
I'm pretty sure he still thinks blogging is lame-o too. Some people are just made of impenatrable stuff.
(btw, I didn't vote for Pedro. hee hee)
P.S. Don't bother throwing rotten tomatoes at me in my comment box. I don't hate Garth Brooks, Toby Keith or Carrie Underwood.
P.S. S. Don't bother stoning me in the public square because, as Gad as my witness, I WILL decide on a favorite student tomorrow after the final.
Ya get me?