Sunday, April 5, 2009

Party like a rock star!

I'm feeling guilty.

My husband is out of town. And I got lonely. So I folded to temptation.

I downed a Code Red Mountain Dew.

Which gave me a buzz.

Enough of a buzz that I stayed up into the wee hours of the morning partying like a rock star with my students.

Well, technically I didn't actually party with them, per say. I mean, they weren't actually with me. But they were virtually with me. And we virtually partied like rock stars.

Virutally partying like a rock star with my students is trippy as helk. I mean Times New Roman size 12 font can seriously mess with your mind at 2 a.m. when it's treading Code Red.

Good times, no doubt!

For starters they were all totally wasted! Well at least their words were totally wasted and their thoughts were totally unfinished. Sometimes they couldn't even complete a sentence. It was a stinkin' laugh-a-thon.

The party got pretty wild and crazy--I wish you had been here to see their participles dangling and their commas splicing. Their subjects and verbs couldn't agree on anything and they kept misplacing their modifiers. UBER entertaining.

My pen ranneth over with enthusiasm.

On the outside I was laughing at them like a responsible adult, but on the inside I was crying over them like a little girl.

Why? Because it was a farewell party--my last-ditch effort to help this batch of rock stars find their prodigal modifiers and reunite their long lost subjects and verbs.

They will only be mine for one more week, peeps!

One more week!

One more week is the loneliest number in the whole wide world (besides one more night).

And I haven't even told you which one is my favorite yet. I pinky promised I would and then I didn't. Instead I ran off to Kona and acted like my mom was more important than my students.

I took them for granted. And I broke a pinky promise. And now I'll be cursed forever to eternal damnation.

Oh peeps! I'm not ready to give my students back yet. (And I'm not ready to be cursed forever to eternal damnation.)

(Is it possible to barter with the universe?)

Allow me a moment to grab another Code Red (and make another pinky promise).

I, Crash Test Dummy, do hereby swear on my office mate that if I break another pinky promise to show you my favorite student, I will accept my eternal damnation without any ire.

Is anyone here a notary public?


Blogging Mama Andrea said...

One more week? Not fair. You should at least get to keep one of them...

I'd take a class from you, any day of the week. I'd even bring you Code Red (though I really think you may want to consider laying off that stuff, especially late at night, you know?)

Love ya :)

IWA said...

I'm hoping my teacher is laughing and having fun when she grades my paper! as you can see, I'm a senior and still don't know how to use punctuation i just .... or ! or just stick a , anywhere! and add a lol!

BTW.... I know your sad.... but i couldn't be happier for the one week left, and this weekend off from church couldn't have come at a better time!

i never told you but i thought your mom was way cute..... and guess what is on the BYUH movie channel...right now! Twilight! LOL! Im going on 14 times!

Amanda said...

wow, this session went by so quick! well, it did for me anyway :)

All that grammatical speak made me realize how much you must cringe reading some of my posts and comments. And think, I get to teach my kids proper grammar!!!

I think Andrea pegged it; definitely time to lay off the code red...and especially on conference weekend!

I am LoW said...

If you fail them all, will they have to come back and retake your class?

Haynsy said...

You have an out.

Johnny Carson interviewed all of his potential replacements on TV and told them all individually that that person was his favorite.

I do that with the grandkids, "you're my favorite ________ " (Fill in the blank.

Heidi Ashworth said...

My daughter is already mourning the loss of her teachers come June. It's so hard--I didn't even think about how hard it must be for the teacher!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Andrea and Amanda, I think you're right about the Code Red. I've had 4 in the past 3 weeks. YIKERS!

Iwa, lol 14 Twilights. I'm going to keep an eye on the BYU channel. Maybe some smokin' hot vampire can ease my separation anxiety better than a Code Red.

Trade one comfort for another. ha ha

Amanda, don't worry about your grammar. I actually have never noticed it. I'm not as observant as Crash. :)


Hansey, even better!!!!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Ah Miss Heidi! Thanks for commiserating.

Jen said...

Takes me right back to all my profs who (no doubt) had similar parties over my papers...

Mariko said...

I'm ready to unload some of mine.
I'll keep your daughter in exchange. FoREVER! MUAH HA HA HA HA.
Crash, are you really saying that they don't get any better at writing in college?
I'm weeping.
It takes all my courage to get through 5 papers in one sitting. No wonder it takes me so long.

CaJoh said...

Wow, one more week. Wouldn't want to tell you to fail them so you can keep seeing them— they do have to make it on their own.

Hope you got enough sleep in the end.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Mariko, Muah ha ha ha Now there's a good spelling for my evil mad scientest cackle.

They do get better in college. . . I'm sure they do. I think so anyway. But it doesn't get any more fun to grade their papers. OH I CAN SO RELATE TO YOUR PAIN. Five in one sitting is torture. It's too bad you don't drink Code Red Mariko. V-8 doesn't give you the same buzz.

CaJoh, why do you always have to be so right? I'm going to poke you in the eye now.

My verifier says bleshon

Bleshon everyone! And shineon too!

April said...

I'm a notary public Crash...true story!

Sign....then I will stamp....and then you are bound...but not really, it only means that I am verifying that you are taking an oath, not that you are being there's your loophole to eternally watch 101 dalmations...but why you'd want to do that is beyond me! Bambi is sooo much better!

nevadanista said...

Sounds like so much fun - staying up on the computer all night. Since meth really isn't an option for me right now, you know, with having to take care of kids and all, and I want to keep my teeth, I'm trying to find another way of never having to sleep. I'll let you know if I come up with anything, cuz chatting online into the wee hours is da bomb, especially if there are dangling participles involved :)

Sorry about your students though. That sucketh!

Oh, that pic a few posts ago with your son climbing that palm tree reminded me of my cousin who lives on Maui near Hana. If you've ever bought a fresh coconut pie at a roadside stand in Hana from a hippie chick with long blond hair and blue eyes, that was my cousin. I think she sells them for $25 a pop!!! She harvests the coconuts herself by climbing the trees. She has a bachelors in chemistry and biology, and is a medicinal mushroom expert as well ;-) That pic reminded me her. Her mother, my aunt, sells tacos in Hana at a roadside stand too. Only Maui beef, she informs me. The locals won't eat anything else :D So, next time your in Hana, check them out :)

verifier: vieukmai - sounds Hawaiian

nevadanista said...

I don't even remember what a dangling participle is, btw.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Oh my goodness, April. So cool, you're a notary. Wow! I can't get away with anything anymore.

Hey girl, how is it having your son back? Do tell. Or did you already tell?

And I so wish I had thought of the eternal dalmation line before you. How cute would that be. And so Crash.

Nevada, no way! I want to go to Maui now just to eat your cousin's coconut pies and your aunts Maui beef tacos. I'm seriously putting that on my bucket list.

Oh, and I can't remember what a participle is either. True story.

SWIRL said...

do you get soooo attached to every class? or just your night classes?

The Crash Test Dummy said...

These 2 classes I've become particularly attached to.


The Crash Test Dummy said...

I think it's because my stone cold heart is melting into a root beer float.

Youngblood4ever said...

I NEED to know who your fav is. Wait, isn't that like a parent choosing a favorite child? Not very kind, don't you think?

nevadanista said...

Hey, what'ya know? It's on my bucket list too! And do you know that Jack Black made my day the other day too, when flipped through my dvr recordings and watched that Office episode in which he and Cloris Leachman made out :D

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

I wonder if it is because you took pictures and posted about it on your blog. Kind of like when you name a stray cat. Or not. Did you watch conference at 6 am this morning? I wouldn't blame you if you didn't. I had a hard time waking up by 10 so good thing I am in Utah.

April said...

Did you know that my son is home? I think the earth has stopped revolving or at least has started revolving around least for a while. He needs so much right now. Especially a good grammar teacher! YIKES! I'm sure it will all come back to him...I hope it will all come back to him....that's it...I'm going to pray for it tonight!

He's home! And we are off to the dentist and the doctor tomorrow. Sounds like fun huh! There are TB tests to be had, and worm pills to be taken and teeth to be fixed because they eat every part of the chicken and cousin to the cow.

But I ramble....have I disclosed who my favorite is right now? NOPE! Not I!

Kritta22 said...


I never thought about going to the doctor AFTER a mission.

Kritta22 said...

Your heart is melting in root beer??

Homemade root beer?

Our Bishop back home would make homemade root beer for Youth Conference and the Ward campout. It's the only reason people went.

People meaning me.

Kritta22 said...

I'm sorry for your almost loss.

Maybe one of them will marry someone else's grandson or daughter or cousin or sister!!!

There's always hope.

Kritta22 said...

By someone else I met, one of your followers.

Oh you heck, you speak Kritta by now don't you?