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Wednesday, April 22, 2009

My post party party post

After we found out our kids had made it on to the National History Day competition in Washington D.C. and that our daughter had made the quarter finals in the OIA tennis tounament I said "let's go crazy!" And my husband said "let's get nuts!'

So we ate at McDonalds.

I seriously ate a whole big and tasty without saying EWWWWW.

And then I downed my root beer and inhaled my fries with a giggle.

And then I said "LET'S PARTY like it's 1999!" And my husband said, "Let's throw our hands in the air like we just don't care!"

Then we fell asleep.

We didn't organize anything or put anything away. 

We didn't coordinate or make arrangements for anything.

We didn't iron or print or staple or glue or tape or polish or hem a single thing.

We didn't even put on our PJ's. We simply walked up the stairs and fell into a deliciously luxurious sleep.

Until I woke up at 2 a.m. in a deep fried stupor.  I couldn't move because I was pinned in on either side by my 10 year old twins who must have said, "Look at mom and dad partying like rockstars! Let's crash the party."

When I got up the next morning I had a super-sized carbonation hang over, my eye lashes were stuck together and my living room looked like it had been sneezing itself silly.

Why do things always fall apart just as other things are coming together?  Huh? huh? huh?  

A few nights later we decided to give the celebration another try so I bought a chocolate haupia pie from Ted's Bakery, which I'm both addicted and allergic to, and busted out our latest family game Would You Rather.

It was delightful until my hub and I had a startling realization. We should not be married. We have absolutely nothing in common.

Get this:

He would rather be liked by everyone in the world than be loved by half and hated by the other half.

He would rather brave a sandstorm than a hailstorm.

He would rather live in a country run by football players than live in a country run by supermodels.

And worst of all, he would rather let 6 ninety year old women and 6 ninety year old men share our house with us rather than let 2 ostriches share our house with us.


What the what?


We are pretty much on the verge of divorce now.   (I did not sign up for 12 Benjamin Buttons when I said
I do! )

Am I right, or am I right, peeps?


I'm just waiting for confirmation from the universe.


36 comments:

Kristina P. said...

I'm surprised your marriage has lasted longer than Pamela Anderson ant Tommy Lee's. Congrats though!

Oh, and I also posted about tasting SPAM for the first time. I sort of just assume that you eat that for every meal, and dessert.

val of the south said...

Kristina P commenting first, all is right with the universe!

You ate the big and nasty...have you no tastebuds at all? It's happy meal all the way sista (or a big mac when I'm feeling particularly grown up!)

So sorry about the incompatibility, but best you find out now, before you waste any more time with him!

Unknown said...

First - You're playing my song (Erin McCarley) Love that.

That sounds like a fun game, I may have to find that one. But if it's anything like TriBond, then I'm not going to be good at that and I'll likely flip the board and walk away in a huff. Because games where I have to think...eh, not so good. This is why I like to read blogs, you think for me.

Happy Partying! Can I get in on that pie??

Sandi said...

Wow you better lose that guy quick before he shows up with all the Benjamin Buttons! I love the way you two party- you know like it's 1999 and all that. haha. Not jealous of the big and tasty....SO jealous of the pie!
p.s. I am sending daughter number 2 over there for a few weeks this summer- Can you please make her some cupcakes too, it's not her birthday or anything, I just think it sounds like a great tradition to carry on and plus I don't think you have quite enough to do!

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

First of all you are always right. nuff said.

Second of all you and Swirl could start a cup cake partnership company.

You could call it Swirly Dummy Cakes.

or Dwirly Summy Cakes.

or Swirly Yummy Dummy Cakes.

or Wirly Swirly Yummy Dummy Cakes.

Yea that last one gets my vote. And look at Sandi just waiting to put in lots of orders with you.

Barbaloot said...

How could he not want to live with ostriches? That shouldn't even be a "Would you Rather" question. Just a prize if you get really lucky.

TisforTonya said...

haha - posted about this game a few months back... okay maybe WAY back - we found lots of things that we didn't agree on :)

Andrea - it's nothing like Tri-Bond.. you'd like this one :)

bring on the ostriches!

WV says fingerst - I'm not sure I could live on a street with that name...

kasey kaufusi said...

oh I love love love that game! Except I like to make up my own questions, gross ones that will make my mom squirm and you HAVE to answer it. Kind of like this: Would you rather eat a big crusty scab off of a strangers leg or a big crunchy cockroach? Yes this game kept me entertained for hours during the summer!

I am LoW said...

Well.... I, uh.... sorta agree with him on the football player/ super model thing.

But you will still post that recipe, right?

AW Cake! said...

I love celebrations! And any night I don't have to cook is a good one, in my book!

Sandi said...

Now you went and did it Kasey- NOBODY will think you are KUTE anymore! You are disgusting!
Oh and HEY NUTTY HAMSTER CHICK..... Cool names and great idea- I love it!

* said...

I get you on the "deep fried stupor" comment...I get that weird, fast food hangover thing too when I eat at those grease pits. And it really bites.

And 12 Benjamin Buttons? I haven't seen that movie yet but it sounds like you're onto something there...
good luck! ;)

LiafromLaie said...

Well the universe is telling me to tell you "bipora" which I'm thinking means "bipolar". If you in fact had Twelve 90 year olds in your home I most def. think they'd make you bipolar.

As for me I'd rather be loved/hated, dodge falling ice then be ripped to shreds by sand, I'd pick football players... we share the same diet o.O, and I'd pick the birds over my home becoming a rest home.

Homer and Queen said...

Oh just stick with him now...don't you about have him trained?

Rockstar said...

Have you ever seen the Seinfeld where he falls in love with the girl that's just like him. He says, "Now I know what I've been looking for all these years... Myself. I've been waiting for ME to come along and now I've swept myself off my feet."

He gets engaged but the infatuation doesn't last long. He eventually breaks it off because he can't stand to be with someone just like himself.

Rock on.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Kristina P. So nice to see you at the top of the page in your new snuggaroo thingy.

I laughed and then said ewwwww to your spam post. I'm going to show ya'll how it's done.

P.S. I won't eat spam unless it's wrapped in seaweed. Gives it that GO-green feel.

Ha ha Val. You made me laugh.

Andrea, Would You Rather doesn't take any brain power at all.

Sandi I will totally make your girl some Kute Kupcakes. I'll have Swirl help me so I can accuse her of bossing me around again. ;)

So funny Kute Kasey. I like your questions better. And they are so pertinent to Emily's (Swirl's sister) experience at Taco Bell from yesterday's comment box. (She found a live cockroach in her taco. eewwww).

Oh my gosh, Nutty Hamster Chick. I LOVE the Whirly Swirly Yummy Dummy Cakes. You're such a genius.

Ha ha Barb! High Five.

T, it's comforting to know you and your hub don't get along either. ;) At least when it comes to ostriches.

Kasey, when your sis comes I'm going to invite you and her over for dinner and a game. You can bring Suli.

LoW I will totally post that recipe soon.

Terresa, I'm so glad you FEEL me.

Lia, it looks like I should have married YOU. We would get along perfectly.

Except after reading Rockstars comment, maybe we wouldn't get along perfectly.

Okay so who's rockstar? I'm curious. Is anyone else curious about the mystery?

Queen. That is such a good point. I might just take your advise.

I am LoW said...

It takes a game to find out they are different from their spouse? hehehe

I figured that out before I married, when we were having grits and I reached for the salt and pepper and he reached for the sugar. :-D

robin said...

If your husband was willing to play a party game with you he's a KEEPER!!! or rather the game is a keeper.

It is hard finding games my husband will play that don't involve teasing our boys and making them cry, or scaring our boys and making them cry or tickling them to death and making them ... well you get the idea. Hey... he learned it from HIS dad (although he could have got the same tips from mine come to think of it!)

and my vote is for the Big Mac as the comfort/guilty pleasure food. now I'm hungry for one. dang!

Sandi said...

Ya.....who is Rockstar? woohoo I can't wait to tell Riley that she has a dinner/game/cupcake invite!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Hey, Sandi, when will your daughter be here? I hope it's August! I won't be her in July (after the 9th).

MakingChanges said...

OMHeck! I LOVE Would you rather! Best game ever! I don't really play the board part, I just love discussing the questions and the logic behind the answers. If you do it this way then you can play with a sister who is 3 states away via phone. How do I know this? Been there, done that and loved it!

PS you are my kind of partier!

Mariko said...

Would he rather live in Hawaii with looming reports of the second flood in a year, or in Utah with its unseasonly snow?

Skeet said...

Hey, I think Rockstar may be my hubby. You do call him "Rockstar" AND I happen to know that he is very well-versed in Seinfeld. BTW I'm with your hubby on all counts except the sandstorm. Has he never had sand in the eyes? Ouchies!

Martha said...

Sounds like a fun game.

The twins were telling me about all the roaches you caught on the glue trap in the car. They thought it was cool.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Youngblood, when I come to Utah we should all play that game!

Mariko, hee hee GOOD ONE!

Skeet, I TOTALLY thought so. Wow! That's awesome. Your hub is using his code name. I hope he doesn't want to be discreet because I'm going to have to out him tomorrow. ;) Since he saved my marriage and all.

Everyone cover your ears so you don't hear this. Especially my living relatives. Martha, my mom would have died to see all the roaches she was driving around in the car with. It would have given her wicked chicken skin for dayz!!!

Did that gross everyone out?

Cajoh said...

Hey… Ho… Hey… Ho…

Don't they say that opposites attract. Why would we want to be the same as our partner (even though sometimes we wind up thinking the same).

Sandi said...

Will you be there in June?

Sandi said...

And yes the roaches in the car grosses us all out! but thats the price you pay to live there I guess.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Sandi, I will be gone from June 9th-20th. When does your daughter come?

Sandi said...

Well this just stinks. I think she is coming on July 9. How is that for ironic? Kancel the Kupkakes :(

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Oh Drat, Sandi!

Let's not kancel the kute kupcakes yet. What day does she return home?

Tiffany said...

Guess what Crash? I love your music. Whenever I want my kids to clean up the playroom I put on music, and guess where I go. Right here, I just turn up the computer speakers and a cleaning they go. I keep you site up four hours just playing away at your play list. It is like a public service you know. At least it is service for me, and I am public.

Here is the problem though. When I go to leave you a comment the music stops. Yup that is right, it does not open in a new screen. Bummer huh. My kids yell at me and say put it back on, but I say hold your horses I am leaving a comment. But they dont understand and bug me until I get back to you page. Ugh

Did you know you could set your comments to have a box pop up, instead of ditching you page. You can!! really!!! Do you want to do it. I mean it would really cut down on the screaming from my kids and you know that would be great. Just a thought.

If not I still love your music and will now hit the back button to go back and listen to the music so my kids will stop screaming at me to turn it back on.

off I go,

PS Love you!!!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

OMGOSH! Tiffany you're a genius. I'm going to do that right now.

And thanks! I do the same thing when I clean. Wahoo!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

I DID IT!

I just know I'll get twice as many comments now!

Sandi said...

I know I have left twice as many as usual so it must be working..haha.
Riley will be there for 3 weeks.....will she get to meet you??

Kritta22 said...

Oh I'm not up for twice as many comments today!

i talked to myslef in Shelle's comment box tonight.

Which you all should go read because I bring up some interesting points in there and some exciting news.

And it's like comfort comment boxing that I talk to myself...so just wander on over to Blokthoughts and get your Kritta dose of talking to herself!

I'm going to go watch Ace of Cakes and finsh chris' quilt!