No Brainer Budget Cuts Part II: Water Fighting: (or) Sink or Swim: (or) Do-it-Yourself Therapy

Yesterday I spilled the beans about our recent re-construction to the family budget and how it's giving me an opportunity to magnify my ready-aim-fire skills in order to nip and tuck our expenses while still having our cake and eating it too.

(I don't know what that means either).

Anyway . . . my husband was pleasantly surprised by how well the Costco birthday party turned out and asked me how I intended to re-construct our marriage budget.

"No more marriage therapy," I told him.

His mouth fell open. "But how will we resolve our conflicts and confront our inner wounded child issues?"

(Hee hee ha ha ha ha. You have no idea how hard it is to keep a straight face while putting those words in his mouth. I love writing!!)

"Have no fear," I told him, "we'll just take our inner wounded children for a swim."

Let me explain how I thought of this brilliant idea.  Lately I've been quoting a statement uttered by my brother-in-law while lying underneath our wimpy ceiling fan during his last visit to Hawaii:

"I'm going to DIE right now!"

Usually I say this right before I stick my face in the freezer.

October is hotter than a tamale in Hawaii and it's not uncommon to see us racing like raving lunatics into the nearest body of water.  Well, somewhere between the racing and the raving we uncovered a deep, hidden, powerful, ancient, mysterious, universal, healing secret.

I'm talking about proactive stress/anger management. I'm talking about assertive communication.

The way I see it is this: why sit in some stuffy office and pay someone to ask you how you feel about your marriage when you can swim-and-tell at the same time? 

Wait! Wait! Wait! Even better: why pay to sit-and-tell when you can swim-and-YELL for free?

Think about it:  exercise/therapy.  

Again, no brainer! 

Normally in the evenings my husband and I go for brisk walks around the community to blow off steam and deal with stress, but there are two drawbacks to this. First, it freaks our friends out when they see us stomping by and shouting at each other. Second, did I mention Hawaii is hotter than a tamale right now? Stomping and shouting really works up a sweat.

A healthier, more private alternative is . . . (got your sling shots ready?) . . . treading water. Shouting while treading is 100% sweat free and the stomping is so much gentler on the knees. Besides, I find the more your voice escalates while treading water, the more exercise you get. (Bulls eye! Two birds, one stone).

If you're going to try this at home, keep in mind that the most pleasant and effective water fighting occurs in places where the rocks don't talk, the trees don't listen and the clouds just shrug and stare. Admittedly, those of us living in Hawaii have a slight corner on this market, 
but lakes, rivers, ponds and backyard pools are acceptable substitutes.   If worse comes to worse, just having a bucket of water on hand to throw in your husband's face while he's telling you how he feels can bring a surprising sense of renewal to a marriage (particularly if he's using that tone of voice.)

I highly recommend this form of exercise/therapy.  I've already lost 10 lbs and saved at least twice that much $$$ (Unless you count the book-spree I went on yesterday.)  

(Oh, and our inner wounded children are recovering well too.  Thank you for asking.)