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Monday, November 10, 2008

The Priesthood Trumps Steroids

Guess what I did last night? I went to a fireside to listen to Ty Detmer, Chad Lewis and Vai Sikahema draw parallels between sports and spirituality. My favorite parallels to draw.

My 12 year old son asked me to go, and I could NOT turn down such a thoughtful invitation. Especially after I'd been begging him for 30 minutes to take me.

You know what's weird about football players though? They remember every single game, play, touchdown, interception, interference, pass and tackle they ever made. You'd think they'd have Alzheimers after getting smacked around so much. I can't even remember the plots of the literature I teach from semester to semester.

I was really glad I begged my son to go because a pro-football-Heisman-priesthood-holder telling spiritual stories can be an extremely effective missionary tool in the hands of a 12 year old. Plus I was ROTFLOL the whole time. Football stories were never that hilarious when my brothers used to tell them. (sorry bros, but flag football just ain't as funny as pro football.)

And to top the whole evening off we got to hear Musical Truth sing. Nothing against the Nephites, but the Lamanites can SING, braddah! Can I get an Amen? Nothing compares to Polynesian voices. If you want to get intense chicken skin, sing a verse of I Am a Child of God with the Lamanites.

btw, did you know that Vai Sikahema recently knocked Jose Canseco out cold in a boxing match?

It just goes to show that the priesthood alway trumps steroids.



18 comments:

LBBlum said...

I'm first!
that is really all I have to say- I couldn't pass this moment up. When I saw- NO ONE had commented I thought- YEAH I can be first.. but what to say..??

nothing to say- except it is my birthday on Thursday.
why am I so happy?

LBBlum said...

I'm second too!

LBBlum said...

can I be third?
how annoying can I be on your blog roll?

OldBoatGuy said...

Canseco deserved it.

lersityp....that's your brain on steriods.

pitypork I pity the pork, but I love to eat 'em.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Ha ha. Boat Man. Pity the Pork! hee hee. So cute.

And Laura! Girl, make a comment already! Something that doesn't have to do with YOUR birthday.

The Rogers Family said...

Crash, I don't want to make all the girls jealous about my experience with Ty Detmer, well actually I do!

So Ty Detmer lived in my ward during the off season of the NFL (this was while he was playing with the Green Bay Packers) so that his wife could finish her degree at BYU. We were playing the championship stake basketball game (at least that is the way I have decided to remember it), and we were up by two. Ty pulled me aside and told me exactly what they were going to do (he must read minds). "Your guy is going to pick me, and my guy is going to shoot the three. Don't follow your guy, switch off." How he knew that I don't know (perhaps Mr. Crash can explain it to me). They did it, I switched, and they didn't get the shot off. Ty was so excited or proud of himself. So he runs up to me and gave me a big football slap on the butt! I haven't washed it since.

I don't believe that disqualified him from using the priesthood? I'll check the manual, but I'm fairly certain football slaps are ok.

'sispitne' hmmm

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Hee hee Rogers Family. Good one.

Alyson | New England Living said...

Funny, I've always thought the priesthood trumps steroids too! I've had many arguments on the matter and I'm glad I've FINALLY found someone who agrees. All the persecution I've faced has finally come to an end. Relief.

I want to go to a fireside like that someday! Can't wait until my kids are old enough.

"truchop" - true chop?! How weird!

Funny Farmer said...

Laura, you are so pathetic. You get Crash in real life and now you have to be FIRST on her comments too? So selfish. :shakes head sadly:

Sikahema was an amateur boxer before he became famous for football, and his arms are about 6 inches longer than Jose's. Skill & reach vs bulk & blather = I should have bet on that match.

Heidi said...

Oh, Jose, you have really fallen far! So, Crash, you won me over. I'm glad because I do enjoy reading your blog (but I am mean and tight and frugal with my time and insist on reciprocity, if that's the way you spell it, with one or two exceptions--I don't even read Pioneer Woman anymore. What can I say, the woman doesn't even know I exist.)

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

OHMYGOSH...HEIDI...don't give up...I campained for PW to comment on my site and she FINALLY did...it can be done! I'll put in a good word now that we are bbff's and you gave Crash the thumbs up for her blog.

Now Crash...people call you DUMMY...and I just think that's racist...so I just call you Crash...but should I be offended because I am your twin? Get back to me on that one!

Also...visited your Australian follower...she is definitely cool...so thanks for introducing her on your blog...

Oh and I agree with you and Alyson...Priesthood TRUMPS Steriods...but only because Priesthood gets RID of that creepy icky feeling and Steriods enhances that creepy icky feeling...

SO did you have to pay a quarter for your ROFLOL? Because since you made that announcement...I find myself stifling laughter on other blogs...afraid I might get fined! It's creeping me out...

MENOHIT...if that doesn't go along with Priesthood and Steriods perfectly I don't know what does...it's almost like the Word Verifier has a mind of its own>>>

Can a get the PRIESTHOOD over here...I'm getting that creepy icky feeling...

Kristina P. said...

But the real question is does the Priesthood trump Trump. Can he fire the priesthood? Inquiring minds want to know.

Funny Farmer said...

I'd bet that Sikahema can KO Mr. Trump as well. He doesn't need a job.

The Rogers Family said...

This is a comment sent to me by my brother. He is so thoughtful to send it to me via email for screening in case I felt uncomfortable about the content. Thanks bro, but I don't believe in censoring my own flesh and blood. I love you just the way you are, even if you are an apostate. (Or a Jack-Apostate as I like to call you.

The original unaltered message:

I believe if you investigate recent consensus genetic scholarship, you will notice that any link between Israelite/Nephite DNA and Polynesian DNA, would truly be a leap of faith. You would need to go back 10’s of thousands of years to connect the two groups. So to describe the singers as deliciously sounding Polynesians, would probably be more proper than Lamanites. There is a short video of Sikahema destroying Canseco on you tube. A definite faith building story. That being said, why didn’t BYU beat TCU(Texas Christian Univ. ) this year. Now that could help prove that there is a connection between beliefs and athletic triumphs. Food for thought. The Apostate


Devoted fan,
Stephen


Verifier says manti

If that's not a message to my apostate brother I don't know what is.

It shouts: COME BACK TO THE FOLD!

The Rogers Family said...

btw, it's me, Crash. Disguised as The Rogers Family.

verifier: therig

The Rogers Family said...

verifier: nedinsub

I read that in kindergarten.

P.S. The priesthood still trumps steroids!

LY everyone!

It's fun being in disguise. I can say whatever I want and it doesn't look like I'm saying it.

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

Oh my Gosh!!!!!! Can I touch you? That is about the coolest thing I have ever hear of. I would probably cut off my right arm to go to that. I am left handed so it is not really that big of a sacrifice. But seriously talk about dream come true. My husband played football against Via in high school. He said that it was impossible to even touch him. And I heard he was a Bishop in New York during 9/11 and helped counsel the workers.
Anyway I am so happy for you and I agree about how great it is for 12 year old boys.

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

Oh my Gosh!!!!!! Can I touch you? That is about the coolest thing I have ever hear of. I would probably cut off my right arm to go to that. I am left handed so it is not really that big of a sacrifice. But seriously talk about dream come true. My husband played football against Via in high school. He said that it was impossible to even touch him. And I heard he was a Bishop in New York during 9/11 and helped counsel the workers.
Anyway I am so happy for you and I agree about how great it is for 12 year old boys.