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Sunday, August 9, 2009

Ba bye now

"A merry heart doeth good like a medicine, but a sharp tongue getteth things done!"--ancient CTD proverb

I testify this is true, particularly if you are having a moving sale and getting ready to pawn off all your earthly possessions.  

But once you make a fortune off your friends and neighbors it's pretty hard not to have a merry heart again, especially if, after they make you rich, they throw you a beach bash to say so-long, fare-thee-well.

Much mahalo my Hawaii friends and neighbors!   

How do I lub thee?

I lub thee with all my stone cold heart (unless you didn't come to my party or contribute to my recent fortune, in which case I only lub thee with half of my stone cold heart). 

And oh how I will miss thee, (and thy $$$) my Hawaii friends and neighbors.

I feel so much lighter now that half of my house is missing.  And quite honestly, it is comforting, in an almost giddy way, that our earthly possessions are living on in the lives of the people we lub--like we're leaving little pieces of ourselves behind.  The useful pieces.

It's almost like we're dead but our ashes have been scattered across the community.  If ashes were useful.   And if one day all of our neighbors were outside talking and suddenly someone looked up and yelled, "The sky is falling!  The sky is falling!" And sure enough when they all looked up our earthly possessions were raining down upon them.

I finally get that circle of life song from The Lion King now.  And that Reduce, Reuse, Recycle song that Jack Johnson sings.  And that part in the Three Bears where they're like "someone is sleeping in MY bed."

It warms my heart to think that Swirl will now be taking pictures of herself in my mirror and Anjeny will now be watching her Korean soap operas with my entertainment center.  

(Plus it felt kinda good to throw in a free origami book even though she doesn't read Japanese. You're welcome Anjeny, that my generosity is so multi-cultural and transcends language barriers.) 

So after we scattered our ashes upon our neighbors and then collected our inheritance, we went to the beach for an LDS BBQ.  (Not to be rude, but there was NO hard stuff to drink--just wimpy Hawaiian juices.  HELLO! Does anyone in the neighborhood read my blog?)  

But bless their hearts, they tried.    And even though the road to helk is paved with good intentions . . . 

JUST JOSHING Peeps, stop throwing tomatoes at me.  I LUB my neighbors and I sincerely appreciate all their meager efforts to dull our achey breakey hearts while still keeping the word of wisdom. 

Seriously, even though I didn't get any brownies, it was the best ba bye now beach bash ever! The only thing that would have made it more exciting would have been if everyone had gone around in a circle telling us who they were going to miss more, ME, ME, ME or my hub.  And then whoever got the most votes would get a brand new red front loader washer/dryer set.  

(And Martha's vote wouldn't count.)


Gots ta go.  I promised my hub a back rub to make up for my sharp tongue.  (A back rub doeth good like a medicine too, btw.)

20 comments:

Rockstar said...

You make me laugh... and think at the same time. Thanks.

The Garden of Egan said...

Cute! Glad your earthly possessions are scattered to the 4 corners of Hawaii. Glad your lubber got a backrub.

April said...

Were your washer and dryer included in your scatterings about your neighborhood? Or is that why you had a sharp tongue with the hubby? DO TELL!!!! Now hurry and give him a back rub! It's not too late for those wires to short out!!! Mountain Dew can short them out! (True story) ps....I lub my front load washer and dryer! The washer is done just about the same time as the dryer! (You can use that in your argument instead of the color line.)

Homer and Queen said...

Just keep thinking BYU Football...

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Ha ha . . . my lubber. That's a funny one. I never even thought of that. You may see that one again.

April, no my washer and dryer are still in MY possession. My lubber doesn't understand why a cute w/d are a priority, but then he doesn't do the laundry. Laundry is a psychological battle so anything that makes wanting to do it a priority seems reasonable to me.

In answer to your question, yes, it did have a bit to do with my sharp tongue. I gotta feeling they are going to short out soon after we get to Utah. Maybe around Black Friday.


BYU Football! BYU Football! BYU Football!

Queen is that supposed to make me feel better?

I think it would make me feel better if I went to a BYU Football game with the Nutty Hamster Chick.

I'm so going to get her some tickets. My lubber has connections now, you know.

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

Oh my goodness don't even tease me like that. Yes you have never watched a game until you have had me screaming in your ear. I am worse than Mary Murphy. True story.

OK it is probably because we were listening to Harry Potter, but this post made me think of you creating all these horcruxes. That way your memory can never die.

Also I couldn't read this post with out picturing Helen Hunt as a stewardess sayin' Ba Bye! Ba Bye, now!

And I think the things we say to our spouses while moving should be able to be stricken from the record as if it were never said. Just sayin.

Colleen said...

I didn't even know about your garage sale until it was over. I think I should get to come over and pick anything I want. How else are we going to start filling the huge void? Don't you have a couple of extra lenses? Maybe we'll just keep T. We were thinking about kidnapping her anyway. We could hide her at Kahuku during the day. The authorities wouldn't even notice, and everyone else would gladly help us hide her. How about G, Truman needs a twin (doesn't everyone) and I don't think he agreed to this move anyway (we'll keep them all!).

Could you sell me one little short story (garage sale prices, remember). Something about being a grown up, like about moving! Why do you have to be so grown up?

Barbaloot said...

I can't believe how fast all your moving stuff is happening! What will Hawaii be without you? But their loss is totally Utah's gain:)

Amber Lynae said...

Do you think your lubber would respond to a petition from your readers on why you deserve and absolutely need a red front loading washer and dryer. I mean to begin with old washer and dryers are not as energy efficient. And getting them to Utah is just doing to be a pain. It would be much nicer to have Home Depot , lowes, or what ever store deliver and set up a new washer and dryer, that is cute, and can totally wash a whole house full of laundry in one load, and use less water than the old washer and dryer. I begin the petition.

Sandi said...

Just as your lubber should listen to us about the haunted house, he should listen to us about the washer/dryer- I just don't understand why he doesn't get that we are very wise women who need to have a say in his life?!
I can't believe you didn't alert me to the fact that you were having a yard sale. Don't you know that KK and Mr. Kaufusi (wow I just realized that KK is going to become KKK!)need EVERYTHING under the sun to begin their wedded bliss? She would have been so thrilled to get some of your junk! Maybe when you talk the hub into leaving the washer and dryer, she can get those! Or are they already shipped off? LOL @ Martha's vote not counting- we are SO on to her!!

iMaLLheaRt said...

I didn't even know you had a garage sale! When was it!?

and I love your garage sale love analogy!

Martha said...

Isn't your w/d like 10 years old? Don't they have rust on them like mine? You don't wanna take those old rusty things to Utah with you. They are going to break in the container.

Wait, why am I defending your need for new front loaders when you are picking on me again? I am so not voting because your contest is rigged that either way if you win or your hub wins you will still get new machines.

What is really important here is if you get a house with a tennis court, pool, or a sports court. Then we would come visit you for your pool or court. We're really not going to visit you for your red front loaders.

Martha said...

I don't know why you didn't get any brownies. There were tons. Savanna's were the best though. I was impressed that there was actually enough food there. Usually, us non polynesians never make enough stuff and leave a party hungry. There were actually chips and chicken left at the end and some drinks too.

Anjeny said...

LOL Crash...I gotta tell ya, my Korean shows look even more dramatic coming through my newly owned entertainment center..lol.

And yes I am looking forward to making my kids do some paper folding in your honor...

I had a great time at the beach bash...but how did you miss out on the brownies? We were in line together, yet I got some but you didn't? Bummer!!

April said...

I am still laughing that NHC says she screams louder than Mary Murphy!! hahahaha!!!

What if you "forgot" to pack the w & d? What if someone needed the w&d more than you? We just had a lesson today on service.....try using guilt to get your new front loader!

Hand over that petition!

IWA (e - va) said...

Ah Martha...your non poly food comment.. I love ya, you're too funny!

Uh, What Garage sale? i didnt even see signs.

Guess what my Financial planning teacher said on Fri? He doesnt understand why people feel the need to have to get red front loading washing machines, when there are some that are half the cost and do the same job! I started laughing and thought of you and kept laughing and then after a few minutes on non controlled laughter i excused myself because he kept giving me weird looks!

Amber Lynae said...

I had another thought as well. Did you know that (at least according to the moving company that moved us from Utah to Virginia) we had to get out washer and dryer typed up. I forget the terms they used. But they have to secure the inside of the washer and dryer so there is no turning and breaking. Is lubber going to take care of that before taking them to Utah? Come on hubby I continue the petition.

IWA (e - va) said...

Sorry I had to run off to a PPI and my comment sounded like I didnt support you getting the Red front loaders... so just t make clear... I would love your transition to Utah to be smoother by getting something that will match your bag!

I promise, Just get "that Kid" to accidently run into it and accidently damage it and then it wont be your fault at all, you can move on having "that kid" on your good list, and you'll get new Red front loaders!

IWA (e - va) said...

HEY... did they sing to you today... or is it next week? did i miss that too? shucks, i keep missing everything!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Yes, Iwa, they sang to us today. It's all happening so fast and I'm not announcing any of it. Sorry. My bad.

Bless my heart.

Ha ha about the front loaders matching my bag. LOL! I knew you supported me all along.

You are all making great cases for the front loaders, but quite honestly, I must confess that all this support and encouragement is really annoying my lubber.

hee hee

It must be man thing. They just don't understand the power of the cute factor in our emotional well being.

Martha. LOLOL about people coming to visit for our tennis courts and not for our front loaders. ha ha Don't even THINK about taking my lubber's side on this one, girlfriend. ;)

Pat, you are scaring me with that Mary Murphy comment. ha ha ha ha ha I'm am NOT teasing you. I am so going to get you to a game. I need to experience the adrenaline rush for myself. Your adrenaline rush, not mine.

I must confess that I didn't get any brownies because I didn't take any. I was just trying to pick on my neighbors.

Sandi, I can't believe KK is becoming KKK. YIKES! Kute Kasey Kafusi. I guess if we drop the Kute, she'll still be KK. But she's sooooo Kute. I need to think of a piece of my junk I can leave with her so we can live on in her life too.

I admit I didn't advertise the garage sale. I just had it. Kevin Costner came to me in a dream and said "If you have it, they will come." And they did. I guess you all are not in tune withe universe. Either that or I'm not a very good communicator.

Sorry guys. Colleen and Carol, I am going to think of some junk to pawn off on your too. Iwa, you too. I think I still have that jelly jar your mom gave me at ward camp.

Oh, and I can't forget Mariko. Mariko, I have some old research papers in my office I can sell you.