I felt like a stripper walking down the high-school-musical-hallway because everyone else's faces were fully dressed, (all the way down to their smiles).
(Am I making Utah out to be too . . . Disney?)
And their sanity . . .
BTW, Did you know that at Disneyland if you fall off a ride, the ambulance arrives through the back gate dressed as Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, puts his siren on mute, then tip-toes you to an underground hospital where he puts a gun to your head until you sign your name in blood that you fell on purpose.
I have no idea why I told you that story. It's pretty much top secret. (If I'm not back here tomorrow I've probably been "silenced" by the lambs.)
J/K, everyone! No one falls off the rides at Disneyland.
NOW would be a good time to smack me!
I hope I'm not giving the impression that I don't enjoy living in Utah. It's pretty much bee-U-tiful right now. And the weather is purrrfect. There is already that faint hint of nip in the air.
In the mornings, after my kids leave for school I stretch out across my bed and stare out my newly windex'd sliding glass doors watching the trees turning burnt amber and thanking Gad that I'm not sweating myself silly.
Despite all the things I miss about Hawaii there are SO many things I don't miss. Like the cockroaches. And their poop.
Pardon moi. I mean, their droppings.
I don't miss the gecko droppings either.
And I don't miss my afro.
Surprisingly I don't miss my warped, gray particle-board cupboards either.
And It's so fun to be able to scream at my kids above a whisper because none of the neighbors can hear me.
For the record, my sister's vacant house pretty much ROCKS! It's just like a playground.
There's this thing on her fridge door that you can put your cup under and when you push it water comes out. And if you switch it real fast, all this ice comes out in itty bitty pieces. And then you can switch it back again and you get more water.
And my darling sister brought some rolling desk chairs over so my boys could fling themselves across the empty wood floors until my head explodes.
And my bro-in-law brought some super slick sleeping bags over so my boys could practice sledding down the stairs until their heads explode.
I was going to say it's like living at Disneyland, but I hate to over-kill a simile.
Plus you don't have to eat salad with a plastic spoon at Disneyland.
If my life were a soda right now I would call it Life Light. Diet Life. Life Zero. It's crisp and clean, w/no caffeine.
If you don't mind eating salad with a spoon, it's downright carefree. What you realize is that you actually can get by with a little help from your friends (and family) and you begin to feel sorry for the poor shmucks who are burdened with all those couches and chairs to sit on.
Surprisingly it's not the big things you miss, it's the little things. Like rubber bands and pencil sharpeners. Like bowls and spatulas.
Like your kids friends . . .
In fact, you almost miss their sanity more than you miss your own.